‘No’ Should Mean No

In a new survey, almost a quarter of the men in  the Asia-Pacific region have admitted to committing the heinous of rape at some stage in their life.

 The study covering six countries – Bangladesh,China, Cambodia,  Indonesia, Papua New Guinea and Sri Lanka – found that 10% of men admitted to raping at least once a woman who was not their partner. The figure rose to nearly 25% when rape of a partner was included.

Image Courtesy: weheartit.com

Image Courtesy: weheartit.com

What struck me as particularly odd was the fact that the men willingly admitted to raping women as they felt they were sexually entitled to such activity.  Almost 75% of the men surveyed admitted to this reasoning while the remainder cited entertainment as their main motive for rape.

Unsure of exactly what the word ‘entitlement’ meant, I decided to look it up. The definition for those of you wondering is –

An entitlement is a guarantee of access to something, based on established rights or by legislation.

Now, I do agree that by virtue of being alive we are all entitled to certain things, food, water, shelter, education, heath care and so on. I do not believe however, that men are entitled to sex. The difference, I hope, is plainly obvious: the things on the former list are all necessary for survival  (if not always, then at some point), while sex is not.

I was speaking with a few of my girlfriends and the broad consensus on the issue of sexual entitlement was that it is a “load of crap”. To some the whole concept was almost laughable and rightfully so. It’s almost as good as saying I’m entitled to kick you in the crotch, as my dear friend explicitly put it. We all know that no one is entitled to kick anyone, and by likening kicking someone in the crotch to sexual entitlement, the hope is that one can see how ludicrous the entire argument is.

Furthermore, as far as I know sexual entitlement is not enshrined by any international organization or national constitution (thankfully) and neither is it enshrined in the UN’s Universal Declaration of Human Rights. As far as legislation goes, I could come up with nothing that guarantees it.

It can be argued that in some situations the story is not so black and white. However, by paying close attention to the countries surveyed in this report, it should be known that most, if not all, of them suffer from grave social inequalities. Women’s rights are barely noticed, let alone, guaranteed.

As such, 1 golden rule should always apply and be engrained into the mindsets of these people, so far removed form reality.

A person ALWAYS has the right to say ‘No’

What are your views? Do you guys believe there is an argument to be made for social entitlement?

We have a voice, use it.

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2 thoughts on “‘No’ Should Mean No

  1. Yes, your post is black and white but maybe that is what is needed to have a proper “revolution” to make sure that we all have the same rights and freedom. Quoting Benito Juárez, “among individuals, as among nations, respect for the rights of others is peace”. As people often say, my freedom ends where your freedom starts (and the same in the other direction). That respect should not only involve not-raping, but also not-touching against the will of the potential victim –touching can be with the body or with words. Thank you for a thought provoking post.

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